what will matter..

salam semua,

my MIL dimasukkan ke hospital jumaat 14 nov lepas pitam masa berkursus kat melaka. so my FIL bawak dia ke hospital pakar johor.dia sememangnye ada tibroids kat ovari tapi bila buat scan pertama, ada air pulak kat sekitar tempat tibroids tu. then, doctor buat lagi satu scan called Ct Scan and they found out it was CANCER.cancer yang dah merebak tu produce air and due to this, perut my MIL seems to be besar.. but doctor managed to get the water out dgn tebuk and connect the lubang with plactic takungan. Claimed by the doctor that probably she will stay around 6 months is the longest or 1 week time.

CANCER? yes! and what makes it worst, it is a final stage SEV4 which what made us feel so so sad bila cancer tu dah merebak pada seluruh ovari , liver and lungs. Masyallah. Cancer is such a silent killer! disamping tu, both kidney fails too and make my MIL's blood got infected by bacteria. but the doctor managed to ease the kidney problem with dialysis and some strong antibiotik. but of coz, the antibiotics wont killed the main problem,cancer.

pelbagai usaha sedang dijalankan.. even we know those doctors attending are all the BEST in the ways. plus, sebab nak puaskan hati kami.. doctor pakar cancer dr singapura didatang khas and redo all checking at one more time. yet, result yang sama diterima.

air mata menangis tak boleh dikira. kesian pada suamiku. tak terhingaa doa selepas solat wajib dan sunat agar Allah permudahkan segala2nye. sebagai isteri yang menjaga anak and suami , aku betul2 akur dgn ketentuan Allah. Redha yang apa diberikan atau ditunjuk ada hikmah disebaliknye. Yang aku boleh buat hanyalah bacaan surah surah Al quran dan doa pada Allah agar semuanye di permudahkan.

bila keadaan dah jadi macam nie.. kami semua speechless. and dikala macam nielah.. kalau kita tak kuat semangat utk our beloved one,we will loose the battle. and disaat ini lah dgn masa yang ada, bukan hanya pada si sakit, tapi kita yg masih segar bugar ini haruslah tunduk pada Allah and memohon ampun maaf atas segala dosa yang ada. Kalau dulu, kita tak pernah bersolat, saat ini lah kita lakukan solat wajib tu,dan mohon agar Allah menerima taubat kita.

aku tak tahu nak cakap macamana.. perasaan ini tak boleh ditulis dan digambarkan.
sedih didalam hati hanya Allah yang tahu..
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Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end.There will be no more sunrises,no days, no hours or minutes.All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten,will pass to someone else.Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.It will not matter what you ownedor what you were owed.Your grudges, resentments, frustrations, and jealousies will finally disappear.So, too, your hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists will all expire.The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.It won't matter where you came from, or on what side of the tracks you lived.It won't matter whetheryou were beautiful or brilliant.Your gender, skin color, ethnicity will be irrelevant.So what will matter?How will the value of your days be measured?What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built;not what you got, but what you gave.What will matter is not your success, but your significance.What will matter is not what you learned,but what you taught.What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage andsacrifice that enriched, empowered or encouraged others to emulate your example.What will matter is not your competence,but your character.What will matter is nothow many people you knew,but how many will feel a lasting loss when you're gone.What will matter is not your memories, but the memories of those who loved you.What will matter is how long you will be remembered,by whom and for what.Living a life that matters doesn't happen by accident.It's not a matter of circumstance but of choice.Choose to live a life that matters.by MJ.

ps: what matter most? HIM!!!